What would my teacher, Ajay, tell me? To be happy. To write for myself. To trust that I will write something for your benefit, and that you will like it. And most importantly, that approval is not necessary. How do I integrate this kind of faith into my daily life? ‘Practice. Practice again and again,’ says Ajay.
Truckee Tahoe has recently been host to a very special couple from McLeod Ganj or ‘Little Lhasa,’ in Dharamsala, India, home of the exiled Dali Lama. Ajay Kapoor and Suruchi Dayal didn’t come to ski or to shop; in fact, they did very little sight seeing. They were completely content to sit, breathing in and out, just being, and sharing their gift with us. Their gift? ‘This moment. Mindful moment.’
Ajay and Suruchi have a meditation retreat center high in the Himalayas, Z Meditation. Z stands for zenith, ‘the end of learning,’ Ajay said. They teach a meditation technique based on contemplation of the conditionings that keep us from our truest identity, our highest self.
They came to Truckee to reconnect with their friend and student Cathy Nason, whom they met in India nine years ago. They brought the lesson ‘Bondage and Liberation’ to For Goodness Sake’s Monday night meditation group – a full house of beings seeking enlightenment. Ajay began by directing us to breathe in thinking, ‘this moment,’ and to breathe out ‘mindful moment.’ When we focus on our breath and on these thoughts, we are present. When we are in the present moment, we are in our natural state of ‘blissful, eternal awareness and light.’ We can always be happy now. Yeah, but…?
Then, they asked us to write our deepest desire on an index card. This, or any, desire is the ‘x factor.’ The teaching is a simple, mathematical equation. We’ll start with the answer, ‘I am complete.’ The formula goes as such:
I = complete.
I + x factor = bondage and suffering, not completeness.
The x factor is the disturbing thought that interferes with happiness. It is the intrusion during meditation that starts you thinking about any number of things, when you should just be being, breathing. Ajay and Suruchi teach us to examine the thoughts that arise, to find the x factor or desire, and to observe how desire creates distance. Distance takes us away from the present moment where there is happiness.
For example, the x factor of self-acceptance. ’I want self acceptance, then I’ll be happy.’ Ajay explained to me that we should be that now, instead of making it a happening of the future. We should just accept ourselves, or whatever the situation is, as it is, as we are. ‘I love myself now,’ said Ajay. ‘The destination is here and now – not in the distance.’
Acceptance is liberation from the bondage of desire. ‘Let go of the x factors,’ he said.
Yeah, but how do we do that?
‘Practice. Practice again and again.’
There is nothing I need in this moment, nowhere to go. I am complete. This moment. Perfect moment.
When I ask people if they meditate, I get recognizable answers.
‘I’m too busy to meditate.’
‘I can’t do it. I can’t stop thinking.’
‘I have monkey mind.’ Exactly. We don’t subdue the monkeys by ignoring them, or by covering them up with business or unconsciousness.
Meditation takes discipline. It is a practice. ‘Do the work,’ said Ajay. ‘One hour a day. Any less than that and it is like fast food.’
Ajay and Suruchi were so happy to be in Truckee with us. They were moved by the powerful sense of spirit they felt here. I asked what that power was.
‘The people. So much love,’ said Suruchi.
For Goodness Sake offers several opportunities to learn meditation in a supportive environment. Mondays at 6: 30 p.m., and Tuesdays and Thursdays at 12:15 p.m. They are also presenting Present Moment – Blissful Moment, a Silent Meditation Weekend Retreat with Ajay at the Clair Tappaan Lodge from 4 p.m., Friday, May 16 through 5 p.m., Sunday, May 18. The cost for the whole weekend, including lodging and meals is $225 per person. Scholarships are available. The Lodge is located at 19940 Donner Pass Road in Norden. For info, goodnesssake.org, 530-550-8981.
